After Visiting Friends: A Son's Story [Unabridged] [Audible Audio Edition] Author: | Language: English | ISBN:
B00CFQF8CC | Format: PDF, EPUB
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Michael Hainey had just turned six when his uncle knocked on his family's back door one morning with the tragic news: Bob Hainey, Michael's father, was found alone near his car on Chicago's North Side, dead, of an apparent heart attack. Thirty-five years old, a young assistant copy desk chief at the Chicago Sun-Times, Bob was a bright and shining star in the competitive, hard-living world of newspapers, one that involved booze-soaked nights that bled into dawn. And then suddenly he was gone, leaving behind a young widow, two sons, a fractured family - and questions surrounding the mysterious nature of his death that would obsess Michael throughout adolescence and long into adulthood.
Finally, roughly his father's age when he died, and a seasoned reporter himself, Michael set out to learn what happened that night. Died "after visiting friends," the obituaries said. But the details beyond that were inconsistent. What friends? Where? At the heart of his quest is Michael's all-too-silent, opaque mother, a woman of great courage and tenacity - and a steely determination not to look back. Prodding and cajoling his relatives, and working through a network of his father's buddies who abide by an honor code of silence and secrecy, Michael sees beyond the long-held myths and ultimately reconciles the father he'd imagined with the one he comes to know - and in the journey discovers new truths about his mother.
A stirring portrait of a family and its legacy of secrets, After Visiting Friends is the story of a son who goes in search of the truth and finds not only his father, but a rare window into a world of men and newspapers and fierce loyalties that no longer exists.
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- Audible Audio Edition
- Listening Length: 8 hours and 5 minutes
- Program Type: Audiobook
- Version: Unabridged
- Publisher: Tantor Audio
- Audible.com Release Date: May 20, 2013
- Whispersync for Voice: Ready
- Language: English
- ASIN: B00CFQF8CC
Memoirs are memories, personal remembrances stored for a lifetime, eventually shared with the world in an intimate, devastating way. How an author would allow people to enter their lives, and examine it, is impressive, as is this can’t-put-down new book, “After Visiting Friends” by Michael Hainey.
When Michael was six, his thirty-five year old journalist father was found dead on the street, apparently of a heart attack. The story never registered as true with Michael, and as an adult, decides to use his journalism skills to investigate the death that happened decades earlier. What he lays out is an utterly fascinating account of the path he took to solve the mystery, and along the way, paints a picture of his family that is honest, and all together real.
The people Michael tells about are tightly drawn and all together real. His mother: widowed at an early age, not spared any sentiment or pity, but richly drawn as a person who did her best to shepherd her family through this event, on the surface never questioning her husband’s death. His grandmother: a strong wise woman succumbing to dementia.
Even more impressive are the people who Michael interviews along the way. One in particular resonated so strongly, she nearly dared to take over the story: Jan Scott, a receptionist in the Forensic Medicine building whose religion permeates her life and supports Michael in ways unpredictable. She’s a compelling character in a story with compelling characters.
These characters, these people, are compelling because of Hainey’s writing style. His prose is short, immediate, and present. He often writes without verbs, making the reading seem like lists, but it brings you right into the story and makes you feel like you are there.
I am a mother of two boys, ages 6 and almost 4. ?I'm lucky to still have my husband's help in raising them. ?I chose to read this book because when I read about it in Entertainment Weekly, it seemed like the kind of book I love to read. ?I like memoirs about family dysfunction and tragedy because I hope I will learn how to rise above setbacks, how to deal with tragedies and dysfunction, what pitfalls to avoid and how to be a good parent. ?I have had my share of traumas to overcome, so I am particularly interested in how others cope. ?I have never lost a parent or anyone very close to me, however.
I agree with the other reviewers on the great writing, vivid details, and bygone but colorful language that immerse you in fascinating American history. ?The book really made me think about so many different things, but I'll only touch upon the parenting and relationship part.
After I read this (Kindle version), and I read this in two days because I was engrossed in it, I was again reminded of how far-reaching a parent's influence is. ?As a parent, you understand that you have an enormous responsibility to your children, but it's good to remember that one day your children will be fully grown adults and hopefully will still have a relationship with you- built upon the many conversations and experiences over decades. ?Behavior and communication patterns established early might still be in place later, so make sure those patterns are working. ?So, this book reminds me that you must help your children to understand things when they ask about tragedy- no matter how painful for you. ?The author's mother did a wonderful job raising her children without her husband. ?However, it seems that a lot of pain could have been alleviated if they could've talked more about the tragedy.
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